This Monday will be week 3 of the Strength building phase of BodyRx. I am feeling bigger, and gained some weight, but it’s to be expected when you’re building muscle. Also, I got hungry again, so I think the muscle is working! 
My waist is still thinning and my back has more bones sticking out. My arms and legs are looking more like they did in High School. It’s weird. I’m excited!
I am moving out of my Parents house and in with a friend who lives about ten minutes away (for those locals who read me, it’s Jarvis. Yes, I’m going to be living with the hipster gaming GOD. This is not going to suck). It’s time for me to get out and find someone to love on (be in love with, make love, something lovey with a girl). Well at least have great sex and friendship. I no longer feel the need to fit the gamer nerd stereotype. Big boy pants activate! Form of… an available single adult!
I am VERY comfortable and things with my parents are great. That’s probably why I feel I need to make this decision NOW. I am not going to find my next love living with my parents. It limits the dating options. Also, I don’t think the financial situation with the house and my parents retirement is feasible. They need to make better plans and my staying here is giving them the excuse to stick it out. This is not the time to be comfortable! This is really hard for me. I feel guilty for leaving and I feel like a failure. I wish I could start a business and make piles of cash but that is just a lie. I am an artist and I need to create. I am tired of chasing the “American Dream”. It’s all BS anyways. I can’t save my parents and I can’t live in a room in their house in some vain attempt to help them. It still sucks. My heart hurts. Actually this is the second time I have made a decision that I know is the right thing even though it’s the hardest thing. Sometimes life is real shit, huh?
I have been terribly exhausted lately. Not sure if my meds are dropping my blood sugar and pressure too low (been checking BP and it seems perfectly fine and very good say 130/70 every day). The Actos is making me break out. I can’t stop the black heads on my face and it’s pissing me off. On Monday my allergies went bonkers and on Tuesday I didn’t go into work, just slept all day. I slept all day Saturday. I just couldn’t get out of bed. Maybe the pollen is kicking my ass really hard this year? Maybe I’m just depressed? I really need to get back into a good headspace, this shit is getting me down.
The website is coming along (www.10nw-web.com). I have the K2 styling mostly conquered, most of the content is now updated to the new format. I have a new “latest news, latest fiction” module coming that I hope will be snazzy and fit the look better than the java slider stuff. I have some tweaks coming for styles with K2 CSS plugin and other tweaks. K2 is amazing. I am very happy with the change over.
I have two pending “I owe you” tasks to get off my plate and then I’m free. One secret web site for a publisher (RPG) and generic-rpg.net forum upgrades and tweaks. Once those are complete, I can get to creating In The Shadows of Gaia with a serious push. I owe the publisher some tweaks quickly, and I will try and get those done early this week (I lost my Saturday to sleeping). I just need to roll up my sleeves and get these finished! Also, I will NOT be taking on anymore “projects” until I am satisfied that In The Shadows of Gaia is solid. Except… I am the newly formed Czar of Welcoming for Vegas Gamers.org (Vegas Game Day) which comprises all the responsibility of a Walmart greeter without the vest and stickers. In other words, it’s simple and perfectly fits my personality. I hardly think it will cramp my style at ALL.
I have volunteered to be GM for Pathfinder Society at Vegas Game Day in May. I have a higher tier module and this should prove a good litmus test as to how I feel about organized play. I don’t have a lot of enthusiasm for it. I always feel like the adventures are rushed and railroad-y, but I hear good things about PFS scenarios, so I’m holding off judgment until I have actually ran one. My new living arrangements should give me a place to run a bi-weekly game using the Serpent's Skull adventure path. I think Pathfinder is a solid game and more importantly I am happy to be running a game with such a large pool of players. If my May experience is trying and boring, I will forego PFS on Game Day’s and run other games. There are too many awesome games out there to feel stuck running something I don’t like. On the other hand, if it’s awesome sauce on toast, then I’m all in.
The Sunday game with Jarvis, Kyle, Aakin, Sharon, and sometimes Devon is proving to be a super fun time. Aakin is currently running Qwixalted, and the game is a blast. I enjoy this groups company as we can play games and also wax philosophical on everything from game design to Anthropology to wacky conspiracy theories. Often in the same string of conversation. It keeps my brain engaged.
I am still thinking of taking up illustration and digital art. I am leaning towards making a daily/weekly comic (more like a Manga) and then illustrating my own setting guide and RPG. My mom is a natural and I’m hoping with some insight from books, I can learn to be an illustrator as well. I will use digital tools to my advantage, so I’m not as concerned about “perfection” as I am style and conveying the feeling I am going for. We’ll see. It’s still in the “I’m thinking about it” stage.
Ciao for the moment,
